Droid Craziness (revised)

So here's the update on the Droid Drama.

I got the new digitizer bought from Amazon.com, and it worked perfectly. So I contacted the Ebay seller and told him it works, so you owe me $20. He said okay, and he'd post it to my Paypal account. That was on Thursday, Dec. 16. I heard nothing else from him.

On Monday I received a message from Ebay Buyer Protection, checking on the status of my claim - they knew he'd offered me $20 but wanted to know whether I 'officially' accepted the offer, as if so, he'd have three days to post the refund from the time I 'officially' accepted through Ebay's resolution center.

I told them I had in fact accepted the offer, and they said he then had until Dec. 23 to post my refund.

Dec. 23 was winding away, and I'd received no refund, nor heard anything from him. But - to be fair - I was going to wait until today (the 24th) to do anything, as technically he had until midnight on the 23rd to post the refund.

But meanwhile, I got another message from Ebay Buyer Protection yesterday asking if the matter was resolved, or if I wanted to escalate the case to customer service. I considered just doing that, but - still giving the guy the benefit of the doubt - thought I'd make one last effort to contact him before doing so (as once you escalate it, it's out of your hands - you no longer negotiate with the seller, and Ebay simply makes a decision, and everyone has to live with it).

So I wrote the seller another email asking about my refund.

He responded last night, telling me that Paypal was holding the $40 I'd originally paid, so he couldn't refund my money because he didn't have access to it, and I'd have to "close my complaint" before they'd release the funds so he could refund my money.

I was extremely skeptical of that claim, so first of all, I went and checked, and Paypal had paid the guy on November 24 - almost a month ago. I wrote him back an email saying only "You were paid on November 24."

Meanwhile, I went back to the Ebay Buyer Protection site and did in fact select the option to escalate my complaint. I explained all that had happened, and at the end of the message, I told Ebay that I'd tried to give this guy the benefit of the doubt, but in light of what appeared to be him giving me the runaround, I would like to know if I was allowed to rescind my acceptance of his offer of $20, and instead ask for a refund of the entire $40. I didn't know if they'd allow it, since I'd already accepted the $20, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask.

Ebay's Buyer Protection site popped up an automatically generated message telling me that they'd get back to me within 48 hours, though I didn't expect to hear anything that soon due to the holiday.

Less than 15 minutes later I had three new messages in my inbox. The first was from Ebay telling me that they had issued me a refund for the full $40. Wow. That was fast. And the whole amount!!

The second one was from Paypal telling me that I'd be receiving the refund of $40, and that processing could take a couple of days.

The third was from the seller (who, since all these messages came in within one minute of each other, obviously didn't realize what Ebay had done yet), telling me that oh yeah, he did get paid on November 24, but then when I initiated my complaint, Paypal "took the money back" and was holding it.

I ignored his message and thought that was the end of it, until 15 minutes later when I received another couple of messages - one from the seller saying that Paypal had 'just' released the money, and so he had refunded $20 to my Paypal account; and a second from Paypal telling me I had received $20 in my account.

Well, hell. Now I've got the seller's $20 refund sitting in my Paypal account, and Ebay's $40 refund on the way.

The seller's statement that Paypal had "just" released the money made me wonder if I was wrong, and in fact, there had been a hold on it - which of course, when Ebay notified them the case was resolved, would have been released right about the time he said it was.

But none of this makes any sense whatsoever. First of all, while Ebay and Paypal do a lot of business, they aren't the same company, so why would Paypal be able to unilaterally put a hold on someone's already-paid money pending the outcome of a complaint with Ebay? And since not everyone leaves money sit in their Paypal account, it seems a rather arbitrary kind of thing - for people who have already withdrawn the money, they are subject to no hold.

But even if they can do that, when I sent Ebay my last message, I explained all of that - that the seller claimed he couldn't post my refund because Paypal had a hold on the money. So if that was true, why wouldn't Ebay have told me, yeah, that's true, and then done something about it - instead of almost immediately just issuing me the full refund? If they knew the seller was telling the truth, it would seem that it would make more sense for them to have (a) told me that, and (b) dealt with the money already being held, rather than initiate a brand new refund directly from Ebay, and then release the Seller's entire $40 back to him.

Second of all, on Monday Ebay told me the seller would have three days to post my refund to my Paypal account. Well, if they knew they'd initiated a hold on the money, why would they expect him to be able to post the refund, knowing they had a hold on the money? The only point to placing a hold on the money would be to ensure it was available if a refund was ordered - so if that was what happened, once the seller and I had agreed to a refund of $20, why not just use the money they'd put the hold on, and instruct Paypal to refund me $20 of the money they were holding, instead of trying to make the seller pony up another $20 before they'd release the original payment?

Third, the seller claimed that the hold hadn't been placed on the money till I initiated my complaint, which was on December 8. Well, if he knew two weeks ago they'd put a hold on the money, why did he never mention that before? When I told him the new digitizer works, so you owe me $20, he said he'd post it to my Paypal account - not "I'll post this to your Paypal account when you release the hold on the money."

Fourth, had I closed my claim like he stated, and then he hadn't paid, I would have had no recourse whatsoever, as once you close a claim you agree that the matter has been completely resolved and you will take no further action. So why would Ebay / Paypal have it set up that you have to close your claim to release the funds to complete the transaction? That makes no sense at all. If Paypal was holding the money because of this claim, it only makes sense that they would allow the release of the funds once an agreement had been reached, but before expecting a person to close their claim. You can't close your claim and state everything has been resolved before you've actually received the refund you negotiated.

I'm only going on about all that because my inherently overly-honest nature makes me uncomfortable with basically telling Ebay I thought the guy was a flaming liar, then wondering (when he immediately posted the $20 refund) whether I was mistaken. I wouldn't like to have called someone a liar if I was wrong.

But I can't see any of this making any damned sense at all.

Well, anyway - I don't see any way to figure out what really happened. Once Ebay's $40 refund also posts to my account, I guess I'll contact them and ask them what they want me to do with the "extra" $20 - since, if Ebay footed the bill for the $40, they may want the $20 to come back to them as reimbursement, not go back to the seller. (That's if I can figure out any way to contact them, as I was just looking around on the site, and I can't find any place to just send them an email - everything's automated forms for situations that don't apply here).

While I was impressed with how fast they resolved this issue, this has been a huge pain in the ass and a real clusterf**k, and I'm not sure I ever want to buy anything on Ebay again.

Meanwhile, the phone works perfectly with the new digitizer, as if I'd never broken it, so that's a wonderful thing.

And otherwise, I've got presents to wrap!! Merry Christmas!

What A Weekend

This was a crazy productive weekend.

Friday night we had band practice, and I've been working on a new part which is pretty intense bow-action-wise, and challenging, and fun. (that becomes more relevant in a few minutes).

Saturday I went out and did some final Christmas shopping, getting not only everything I hoped to find, but finding things that were even better than I hoped! That was nice. I also washed the truck (it was hideous after the recent snows and salt-laden roads), so that made me feel a lot better.

Later Saturday afternoon and evening, I baked cookies - peanut butter cut-outs and jam thumbprints.

Today, I made three of my clay snowman ornaments for my co-workers.


I originally made one of these for myself, but everyone who has seen mine liked it (I already have an offer to sell one), so I made these, but they're still kind of prototypes. Hopefully in time I'll perfect the design.

I spent a few hours working on a present I'm making for someone, too, but I can't talk about that here because, obviously, it's a surprise.

I also baked more cookies (chocolate with peanut butter chips) and decorated some of the peanut butter ones for work.

And oh my God, I made a pan of the world's best fudge. This was my mom's recipe, and I always said my mom's fudge was the best in the world - it wasn't just because she was my mom, I really never have had fudge as good as hers - but I could never duplicate it (even though I was using the same recipe). Hers was so creamy that it just - quite literally - melted in your mouth. Mine tasted just as good, but was always too hard, like it would actually crumble.

Tonight I figured out what I'd been doing wrong all these years. Her hand-written recipe said "2/3 cup (small can) Carnation Evaporated milk." Well, every time I went to buy this, they only had one size can, so I figured that was the 'small can,' and would always use the entire can.

Tonight I decided to make a double batch, as the single batch is always just too small, so I actually decided to measure the evaporated milk. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the one can was actually double what the recipe called for. So all these years I'd been putting in twice as much evaporated milk as it was supposed to have. I'm surprised it didn't make it runny and unable to set up, instead of too hard and crumbly.

This time, using the proper amount, I made the perfect fudge. I'll be in a sugar coma within 48 hours.

But back to the fiddle thing - my right hand is in such excruciating pain I can barely move it. Typing does hurt, but not as bad because I don't have to move it much to do that. But opening and closing it, or trying to pick anything up, is kind of impossible. It was a combination of the fiddle playing Friday night, working with the clay today (conditioning new clay is labor intensive and hard on the hands, and forming the pieces, smoothing, shaping, etc. just added to the mix), and probably washing the truck (manipulating that spray wand at high pressure, in the freezing cold) and cookie making as well (holding a hand-held mixer, stirring things with a spoon, rolling the batch of jam thumbprint cookies into little balls, etc. etc.).

Basically, I beat the hell out of my hand this weekend, and I desperately wish I had a paraffin dip bath. I do have some paraffin ... somewhere ... I suppose I could melt it in a double boiler (i.e., in a tin can in a pan of water) and pour it on ... something to consider.

But, it really was a great weekend. Now I just have to work up the energy to go clean up the kitchen from the last batch of cookie decorating and fudge making, clean up the upstairs from the crafting today, and turn off the lights, and settle myself in downstairs with some rum. Mmmm.

This week I have to take my truck in to my mechanic because it's giving me grief, which is a pain in the ass, because he wants to keep it all day, which means finagling around getting it there, getting to work, and getting it back again. And I have to wrap all my presents and finish decorating cookies.

But, I'm in a good Christmassy mood this year, and it's a holiday week - my favorite time of the entire holiday season is the week leading up to Christmas. And, it's a full-moon winter solstice tomorrow!

So I'm looking forward to a good week.

Droid Drama Update

I'm adopting a new philosophy: "The universe loves me and just wants me to have an interesting life."

I posted awhile back about dropping my Droid and cracking the screen all to pieces, but then learning that I could order a new digitizer and our office computer guy would put it in for me. So I ordered one from Ebay (as recommended), it arrived promptly, and our computer guy installed it.

The "back" soft key didn't work. Well, now, that wasn't entirely disastrous, but it was hideously inconvenient. Do you ever notice how much you use the 'back' button on one of these phones? It's the main way to navigate in and, more importantly, back out of menus and many applications. If it would have been something dumb like the 'search' soft key, I wouldn't have even cared, as I never use that one. But the 'back' one was difficult.

I eventually learned work-arounds for most things, though it was annoying and tedious, and in a few instances there is no work-around except to shut the phone off and turn it back on, to restore a certain app or function to its main screen.

The computer guy said there might have been a tiny piece of dust on the contact or something like that, and that he'd take it apart, check it, and see if that helped.

He did that, and it didn't help. Both he and Greg suggested I contact the seller. Initially I wasn't going to, as I thought, oh, it's just one of those things, it won't do any good. But then I saw where Ebay has "Buyer Protection" now - if you have a problem and can't resolve it with the seller, they will refund your money.

I'd already decided to buy another digitizer and see if that one worked (the loss of that 'back' key was annoying enough that I decided I'd risk another $40 to try to get it back), so I thought, well, it can't hurt to try. I sent the seller a message last night, very polite, explained the problem, and said I just wondered if he knew of any fixes, or had any more digitizers he might be willing to swap.

He wrote back and, while he was extremely polite, basically told me 'too bad, sorry to hear it,' and went on to say that he "knew the soft key didn't work" and hoped I could "figure something out."

Huh. Because his original sale page description said: "Product is brand new and tested to guarantee it works.

Well now. So I initiated a claim under the Ebay Buyer's Protection thing, and they sent him notice of it. Then we began exchanging emails. The first thing he said was that he had made a mistake, and confused me with another buyer, to whom he sold an actual Droid phone (not digitizer) on which the back key doesn't work ... so he thought I was them. Then he figured out I had only bought the digitizer, and he assured me - again - that it worked fine when he shipped it to me.

I replied that it arrived well packaged and didn't appear damaged in transit, I had an electronics expert install it, and it still didn't work ... so I'd beg to differ.

After a couple of very polite exchanges, in which he continued to insist it worked when he sold it, he offered to refund half my money as a compromise.

This got me thinking. His emails struck me as sincere, he was truly apologetic, and I believe that he truly believed the thing worked when he sold it. I also don't know for a fact that it's not my phone, instead of the digitizer. The bottom line is, there's no real way to tell what happened.

Meanwhile, I'd ordered a new digitizer, through Amazon - it's from an outside seller, but a reputable electronics store with a 5-star rating, so I figure if there's another problem, I'll have a good chance of having some buyer protection there as well. And it was the same price.

So a plan occurred to me. I was concerned that if I continued to be persistent, and Ebay Buyer Protection refunded my full purchase price (which I assume they'd go after the seller for), and then I got the new digitizer and discovered the back button still didn't work, I'd feel like a real moron - because it wouldn't have been the digitizer after all, but my phone.

So I made the seller an offer. I told him that we'd put the matter on hold for a week - if my computer guy installs the new digitizer, and the back button still doesn't work, then it was my phone, not the digitizer he sold me, and I would ask for no refund. However, if the new digitizer works 100%, then the problem was his digitizer, and since he is so sure it worked when it shipped, and there's no way to prove when or where the damage occurred, then I would accept his offer of a refund of half my money.

He was happy with that, and - in a telling statement - even said to me, after apologizing again for my phone problems, said he sincerely hopes the new digitizer works out for me. Well, if he gets his wish, he'll owe me $20 - whether he remembered that or not when he said it, I don't know. So it just renewed my belief that the guy's honest, not trying to rip me off, and actually hopes my phone gets fixed. So I do think the guy's being sincere. But maybe I'm just a big schmoo. Doesn't matter, I'll feel better about it this way, and that's what matters.

Meanwhile, the other night my SD card died. Just died, no reason. At first I thought it was another malfunction with the phone, but then I tried Greg's card and it would recognize that one - just not mine. So I went out today and picked up a new one, and it is fine.

I thought I was safe because I'd downloaded a file manager program awhile back that lets you sync your phone with your computer wirelessly, and backup all your data, and I'd done that when the screen cracked. Well, funny thing - I cannot figure out any way to get the data back onto the phone. I tried everything, went to the website looking for help (nothing at all useful there), zip, nada, zilch. The only thing I was able to recover was my pictures and music (very important, though, so a good thing!) but none of the apps I had installed solely on the sd card.

Well, that wasn't the end of the world, because there weren't that many, and I've been able to replace most of them. A few are acting incredibly squirrelly - I re-downloaded them, but they still won't work. Whatever. I'm tired of screwing with it.

Meanwhile ... one of the black plastic strips that makes up the 'back' of the phone (the back isn't a solid back, but a couple of different flexible black plastic pieces that basically stick on with double-sided tape) fell off and disappeared somewhere yesterday. My computer guy warned me that might happen, after removing and reinstalling them several times. If I'd have known when it happened and got the piece, I could just put it back on. But since I have no idea where it happened and haven't found it yet, I now have a 'raw' strip on the back of my phone that isn't covered (well, it's partially covered with the old double-stick tape, but that's ineffective), I have to try to cover it with something.

This phone is rapidly turning into a paperweight. In another moment of 21st century irony, last night, while sitting downstairs with Greg, when I first discovered that the strip was missing off the back and the sd card was also fried, I looked at him and said, in great frustration, "Well now it's nothing more than a phone." Huh.

But anyway ... I'm hopeful. That the new digitizer will work right ... that I'll find something appropriately quirky to cover up the phone's raw bit on the back ... that I'll fix the broken apps and the new sd card will be fine ... that in a week or two it'll be at least somewhat back to normal, and no longer "just a phone."

(Actually I'm facetiously exaggerating - in fact, most everything does still work ... email, Twitter, games, camera, music, texts, Kindle ... oh, and the phone ... so it's not really that bad).

I also picked up a padded case for it today - it's actually a tiny camera case but it works. If I can get this thing fully functional again, I'm going to baby it like a Faberge egg.

21st Century Irony

I'm considering suicide, but I know I'm changing insurance policies in January - I'm switching from a private policy to my employer-provided group policy - so I'm wondering if I should wait (for the suicide attempt) till after January 1, as if it fails, it might be considered a pre-existing condition.

Gotta love life in the 21st century.

Or not.

(Of course, the fact that 'failure' enters into my contingencies means I'm not that serious so don't fret about this one. The one to fret about will be the one no one sees coming. ;o) )

A Blockbuster Week From Hell.

The thing I'm most thankful for right now is that this week, at least as far as enforced dealing with the outside world, is OVER. This one will go down in the books as a bonified week from hell.

On Monday my boss had an insurance guy come in to talk about changing his group insurance, as it's too expensive. My boss has always provided health insurance for me, but not through his group policy - I had my own private policy when I started there and he just paid that instead.

My boss has an accounting firm handling his books ... I've had my taxes done by someone almost every year ... there was no reason that my boss paying for my health insurance should have thrown up any red flags in my world. But this guy, out of the blue, just blithely informed us that we'd been committing tax fraud for 14 years, as the way the laws are set up, because I wasn't a part of the official 'group' plan, all money my boss paid towards my health insurance premiums should have been taxable income to me, and if I ever got audited, I'd owe taxes on it (minus the part I would have been allowed to write off - if they consider it income to me, they have to allow me to write off what "I" am paying for health insurance, to a point, but there's a cap on it - it would no way have been all of the premium every month).

The astronomical health insurance premiums times 14 years meant I could have owed the IRS upwards of $100,000. Needless to say, I was kind of freaked out. Yeah, only if I got audited, but still ... for someone who is beyond anal about always making sure they do things like taxes absolutely right (I paid a tax person $40 a year for a decade to do my taxes all just because of a $20 a year royalty check I got from a gas and mineral rights contract - I'm anal about taxes).

So I was pretty freaked out about that, but the next day my boss checked with his accountant, and Mr. Insurance Guy Who Thinks He's A Tax Expert was wrong. My boss' accountants DID set it up right, so that it's all legal and above-board, nothing wrong.

Then on Tuesday my boss sprung on me that the day after Thanksgiving, which I've had off paid for 14 years, is no longer a paid day off. I can work it, or I can take it off without pay.

Lovely. I respect the fact that economy sucks, and that a lot of people do have to work that day - but that was low on several levels. For one thing, I've been there FOURTEEN YEARS ... I'd think I deserved a little consideration, especially considering not paying me for the day saved him a whopping $95. Big deal. I'm sure that didn't make or break him financially, but it's 3 or 4 Christmas presents for me - right now, mere weeks before Christmas.

But even more crappy, he could have freaking given me some warning, instead of springing it on me two days before-hand - and that only because I asked, because I'd heard a rumor that's what he was doing. For financial reasons, I'd have probably chosen to work it instead, but after the way my week went steadily downhill (oh, the best is yet to come), I was in NO MOOD and desperately wanted that long weekend to recuperate. So I took the hit and took the day off, without pay.

And that really pissed me off.

Then, the icing on the cake was, I came home and accidentally did this in the driveway.

WARNING: Disturbing Photo To Follow


Yep. That's my Droid. To say I was pissed was the understatement of the decade. I was taking my stuff out of the truck when I came home from work, and it just slipped and hit the driveway.

Sigh.

Initially I thought I was going to have to shell out hundreds of dollars for a new phone (no, of COURSE I didn't have the damned insurance). But something finally went somewhat right. (or, well, it might - remains to be seen).

The phone does still work, completely normally - it's just annoying as hell looking at everything through that web of cracks. But I found out that these screens (or "digitizers" as they are actually called) are replaceable. The guy who does our computers at work has done this many times for people. I ordered one on ebay for $40 (which our computer guy said was a really good price) - it's advertised as being brand new, still in the original packaging, never opened or used. And I did some poking online, and apparently this is REALLY common, and many people have successfully fixed the phone this way.

I only say 'remains to be seen' because it is possible the process could go awry and wreck the phone - it looks complicated to me, as you basically have to take the entire phone apart from the back through to the front, removing the motherboard and all it's guts ... but even if that happened, I'm not out anything but $40, because I would have to get a new one anyway if this wasn't an option - as I said, I can't deal with trying to read anything on the screen through all those cracks for very much longer.

So ... there's hope that it can be restored for a mere $40. Which makes not having the insurance a little more of a non-issue, because with the insurance I'd have had a $50 deductible, they'd have only sent me a refurbished phone, and I'd have had to set it all up all over again. This way I get to keep my phone, all personalized the way I like it, and it cost $10 less.

I think I need to be kept away from expensive electronic equipment. I wrecked the keyboard in my netbook last spring by spilling an entire drink into it (well, that really wasn't my fault - someone set a full drink down RIGHT in FRONT of the keyboard, without me knowing it, while my back was turned - so I turned around reaching towards the computer, and knocked the whole thing over right into it - I never, EVER sat my drink down that close to the computer, so I don't take full responsibility for that one).

Sigh. I just want to go hide in the Imaginarium until next Monday morning.

More Creativity On The Loose

I've been working on some projects.

I made a necklace awhile back, but I don't think I posted any pictures. It's kind of simple, but it was my first foray into working with clay and making beads. The three brown beads are clay, and the strip with studs around the middle bead is also clay (well, the studs are mini-brads).


That was nice as far as it went. But I've made another one.





I picked up that center piece - the heart - at a craft store one day a few weeks ago just because it was cool. I was planning to make a skirt, and had gotten the material for it - shades of brown - and decided that I wanted to wear a brown turtleneck with it, then use that focal piece to build a kind of large, rather simple necklace to wear with it - it all seemed like it would go so well together.

So that's what I did. All of this necklace is from store-bought parts except the twisted brown and tan beads - I made those.


I like this one a lot better. I'm sure over time my skill and creative 'eye' for things will improve. But in the end, all that really matters is whether I like it ... I'm the one making it (and wearing it, for now anyway ...).

In other clay news, I was making my first steampunk Christmas ornament, and finally finished it today, and put it in to bake - and promptly burned part of it! I'm not sure what happened, as the oven hadn't even heated up all the way yet. I hadn't moved the oven racks or anything, and I've been baking my other pieces in the same exact spot, so - I'm kind of baffled by that.

Oh well. I took it out to cool, I'll trim away the burned bits, try to re-fashion it a bit, re-bake, then post pictures. It'll be fine. It was mostly a practice piece anyway. And I need it - the practice - this type of work is kind of complex and tricky, so I suspect it's going to take a lot of practice and trial-and-error, and it'll be awhile before I'm turning out anything really stellar. At least a couple weeks. ;o)

... like another hole in my head ...

Well, I've gone and done it now. I've found a new hobby - uh, art form. I've hesitated to even mention it, as I have so many hobbies that I can never finish anything as it is. But this one ... um, this one feels different. I've never been quite so enamored of a new hobby before. I just spent about 6 hours today working on a project, and didn't want to stop, but had to - had to get a few other things done (like walk and feed the dog!). It's a rare hobby (even a new one) that can keep me interested for that long at a stretch, and I still didn't want to stop - and can't wait for the next session, I have so many ideas!


Oh - what is it? Polymer clay! Holy cow, where have they been hiding this stuff? It's like the perfect art medium. You can do just about anything with it. You can make beads (of an incredible variety), or sculptures which could become anything (jewelry parts, pins, Christmas ornaments, etc.), you can make boxes and vases, cabinet door knobs - pretty much anything decorative that exists, you can create (or re-create) out of polymer clay. You can put things in it (gems, stones, wire, metal), you can paint it or treat it with metallic or decorative powders ...

... I know, I'm gushing. I'm pretty enthralled.

I tried polymer clay many years ago, when all there was, was Fimo. It was hard and crumbly and I couldn't accomplish anything with it. I only bought one or two packages, messed with it once, and I think threw it out.

I had one other foray into clay, a few years ago at an event there was a 'dress up your stuffed animal' contest. I had a stuffed bear I decided to dress as Robin Hood, so I made him a quiver and bow out of clay. Problem was, I didn't know you had to bake it. (duh) So I got the bow made okay, and it looked alright, but when I tried to attach a taut string to it, it just began to bend.

This time I did a little reading up before trying anything. (and they have better quality stuff now - the clay I bought, Sculpey and Premo, is FAR easier to work with than that beta version of Fimo) So my first project was totally successful! It was a necklace - I made some of the beads out of clay, then after that was done, added another clay embellishment to one of the plain beads, and re-baked it. (Yep, you can even do that! and I didn't even have to take the necklace apart to re-bake it, because the low temperatures used for clay - about 260 degrees - wouldn't harm the other metal findings or the leather cord it's strung on). It turned out pretty nice (I forgot to take a picture of it today though).

What really got me fired up (no pun intended) about polymer clay, though was a book I ran onto by accident called "Steampunkery" - steampunk polymer clay sculpture. Totally, completely awesome. (that's what all the detritus in the lower half of the picture up there is - watch parts for steampunk sculpture!)

So some of my first projects are going to be steampunk Christmas ornaments. :o) I mentioned this to my friend Wren, and she wants one, so today's marathon session was creating a steampunk bird ornament for her. It's going really well, but it's not done yet, so no good pictures. I have lots of other steampunk Christmas ornament ideas ... steampunk Santa, and/or steampunk sleigh pulled by a mechanical reindeer ... an airship (of course!) ... wreaths, snowflakes, 'regular' ornaments with various interesting embellishments ... steampunk angels? The imagination staggers.

I'm also working on a second necklace (made the beads for it today, just haven't put it all together yet), and then another necklace - I'm designing these around my wardrobe. (I'm turning into such a girl). I recently bought a turquoise sweater, since most of my wardrobe of late has been various shades of brown, and I thought I needed something colorful. It's a v-neck sweater, so I thought a nice piece of jewelry to wear with it wouldn't go amiss. While brainstorming what would go with turquoise, I decided on a snowy-looking, turquoise-and-white winter theme. There are going to be turquoise and crystal beads, with probably some snowflakes, and a clay snowman motif going on somewhere.

Well, I'll stop now. But I'm thinking some of the other hobbies are going to be hitting the highway, because I'm pretty well seriously addicted to this clay stuff.

Halloween - Our Way

Here's a sampling of how we do Halloween and Trick-Or-Treat around here.




You'd think some of them would be scared to come up and ask for candy ... and you'd be right, some of them are. The candy's in the 'treasure chest' sitting on the chair, and when the kids come up, the Commodore asks them if they've come to steal his treasure. More than half of them, at that point, look like they're thinking, 'Screw this, there's far easier ways to get candy.'


But you never know ... last year the Commodore made one kid who wasn't getting into the spirit of the thing 'walk the plank' (a board he laid out on the ground) and the child did not seem at all amused. However, he came back this year - dressed as a pirate. And reminded the Commodore of last year's event.

But the cool thing is, one woman's statement made it all worthwhile. It was late, Trick-Or-Treat was almost over when she showed up with a gaggle of kids, and told us, "You're the talk of the town! Everyone said, 'You have to go find the pirate house!' "

That was kind of gratifying.

Tyler wasn't exactly in with the theme, only because I never got around to making him a pirate outfit ... and since it was chilly, this one works well because it's very warm. It looks better when he'll keep the 'head' on, but of course he won't. (The 'head' being a hood that, when pulled up, looks like the top of a dinosaur head - very cute, for the several seconds he'll leave it in place). There are also spikes that stand up along the back, but I just couldn't capture a picture that got the whole effect this time.


All in all, a pretty fun time tonight.

My Masochistic Hobby

Yes, it's knitting. (What were you thinking?)

I've tried, over the years, to knit sweaters several times. Every time I had to give up because I'd get 3/4 of the way through (don't ask me why it took me that long to figure it out) and realize the thing was turning out monstrously the wrong size. Well, every time but one. I hopefully and optimistically finished that one, and didn't discover it's flaming disasterness until after it was all done.

I made my dad two sweater vests (he liked that sort of thing). The first was too small. The next was so much too huge it would have been comical if I weren't so pissed (it was his only Christmas present that year, and I was finishing it on Christmas Eve when I realized it was miles too big - so no time to do anything about it, or even get something else).

But ... despite all evidence that I'm an utter failure at knitting sweaters, I've decided to try another one.

My problem has always been (I think) gauge. In knitting, you're always supposed to knit a gauge swatch - a piece of knitting using your chosen needles, yarn and stitch pattern - at least 4" square, and then take measurements to match up what you're knitting with the size you want to knit. And I always do a gauge swatch! In fact, after the first or second disaster sweater, I did much larger gauge swatches, sometimes as much as 14" square.

Why? Because my curse du jour was that my knitting seemed to get much looser the farther I got with it. My gauge would be dead on at the beginning, and it wasn't until I had, say, and entire sweater back done that I'd discover it had enlarged and was now 3 sizes bigger than I'd intended.

The only thing I could figure out was that somehow the knitting was stretching as the piece got bigger and heavier. Yet I'd never heard any other knitter complain of that, nor had I ever read any suggestions to counter-act that. So ... I can only assume that it was me, that my stitches just got looser and sloppier as I knit.

I decided to try yet again, but with a scheme to counteract that tendency. Usually when you make a sweater, you first measure the intended recipient around the chest, then add several inches to that for ease - otherwise, the sweater will fit like a bathing suit, not a grand idea.

I chose my measurement size, then purposely didn't add the ease. I figured that way, when the thing ended up several inches bigger than it should, it will 'just fit.'

I think this may be a faulty plan, but ... I'm trying it. And so far, it seems to be working. I have about 12" of sweater back done, and checked the measurement - sure enough, it's 1" wider than it should be. One inch isn't much - oh, it's enough to make something not fit (because that's 1" on the back, and 1" on each front side piece, adding up to 3" or more too big - if you'd already added ease to make the thing loose to begin with, you end up with a sweater that you and your best friend could wear at the same time ... which may be okay under certain circumstances, but was not my goal).

However, without having added the ease, adding 1" to all the pieces of the sweater by 'accident' will, in fact, make it the right size.

In theory anyway. I still wish I could just get the damned gauge right, and don't understand why I've never seen anyone else mention this problem. I cannot be the only one.

Anyway - I'm still kind of cautiously psyched about the sweater, and will keep you posted.

In a brief other-news update, Tyler's been doing GREAT! His eyesight is back to being what it was at least back in the early summer, before the eye catastrophe struck - he navigates around the house and yard without any issue, even when things get moved around. He follows me around the house with no problem. He seems to feel good, has been perky, interested, had a great appetite lately. Just all around seemingly doing really well.

No thanks to the waste-of-time holistic vet I took him to last week. I can't remember if I wrote about that. If not, I might, some day.

In My Backyard Today.

One of those autumn 'gift' days.

I. Am. So. Screwed.

I think I'm in for a rough couple weeks, if it lasts that long.

I said in my last post that after 12 years of harassment and bullying, I finally couldn't take it anymore, and I told my boss last Wednesday that I was going to start looking for another job.

Initially he was devastated, and practically begging me not to go. I was grateful for his appreciation, but tried to explain to him that I just couldn't take it any more.

One of the reasons I'd never said that to him before, wouldn't say it until I was prepared to have to leave, was because I was afraid there was a chance he'd just wig out and fire me. But initially it didn't look like it was going in that direction.

Today, however, things clouded up. One day last week one of the things my boss started talking to me about was how he always feels so overwhelmed at the office, how he can't keep up with his work, and constantly fears a grievance. I told him that I could think of a dozen things with no effort that we could do to streamline processes, save time, and make the office run more efficiently. In fact, I'd tried to talk to him about many of these things before, but while he'd always say "That's a great idea!" he'd just never do anything about it.

This time he jumped on it, and said that was great, he wanted to hear my ideas, and told me that on Friday we'd get out of the office, go out to lunch or something, and discuss my ideas.

That night I started putting together a list, but then realized - wait a minute. This is so totally not the issue right now. We have a far bigger fish waiting for the fry, he asked for seven days to try to resolve this 12-year-old problem (that's a kind of double entendre, for sure), and that seven days was going to be up Wednesday - we really needed to focus on that, and not get sidetracked on other issues. So I decided I wasn't going to have that meeting with him on Friday after all.

But Friday he seemed to have forgotten about it, and never mentioned it, and I said nothing.

Today when I got there, first thing, he came up to me and said, hey, we forgot about our meeting on Friday, we have to reschedule that, how about today. I took a deep breath, and calmly said, "Well, actually, I'd like to postpone that meeting, because it occurred to me that we have a bigger issue to deal with this week, which is far more urgent, and I don't want us to get sidetracked on something else, we need to address this other problem first."

He got pissy. He stalked off angrily, then turned back around and said, "Well, could you at least give me a list? Just write down these 12 'clever ideas' you said you had?" With very snotty emphasis on the 'clever ideas' phrase. It was just a snotty, pissy statement.

I looked at him for a moment, then just said "Okay" and went back to my office.

I debated not doing it, but decided I would anyway, just so as to not give him any excuse to accuse me of not being a team player or trying to help the office. But I wasn't feeling terribly motivated, and didn't get it finished by the end of the day. He didn't ask for it.

A little while after that conversation, he went and closeted himself in the office manager's office, for about 20 minutes ... then came out all cheerful, even with me.

So, I'm quite paranoid about that. I'm fairly certain that he's told her what's going on, and I'm concerned that they are, together, cooking up something pretty shitty for me. She's very persuasive with him, and he always listens the most to the last person who said anything to him. Since he's not talking to me, that'd be her. God alone knows what kind of utter and complete bullshit she's feeding him.

I knew when I did this that I took the chance of it going this way. I'd hoped for more adult-level dealing, but apparently my hopes were misplaced. I think things are about to go horribly downhill for me at this place.

And certainly nothing's changed with her. She's still using the bottom step outside my door as my 'in-basket,' refusing to speak to me, and has currently not produced my health insurance check, which is due now (I have a private policy which my boss pays, but she has to give me the check every month). It's not late yet, but it's getting close, and is past the time she usually gives it to me by.

I'm totally torn as to what to do. I'm horribly tempted to just quit - with or maybe without a 2 weeks notice - to just get the &$@* out of there before something really awful happens. But I'm really worried as to how that will effect my future job prospects. I've considered giving a two weeks notice, then just looking afterwards. But I don't know what I'd tell potential employers as to why I did things in that order.

Another alternative is to try to find something as fast as I possibly can. Maybe I can look into temp work. I could always say I quit this job and purposely did temp work because I wanted to explore other fields until I found something I wanted to do - because I wanted to get out of the legal field. After 19 years of depressing divorce cases, that wouldn't be too hard for anyone to buy.

Or, I could quit and start drinking 24/7, and then get Social Security Disability for incurable alcoholism. Apparently it's possible - we had a client who did it. Of course, he died in his 40s of liver failure. But then again, I just found out the girl who works at the office next door died of a heart attack over the weekend, and she was only in her 40s ... that's probably the direction I'm headed in if I don't get a break pretty soon. (I morbidly wondered if I could get her job, but I remembered that before they hired her, the other girl there, Kim, told me about the opening, but you have to be a paralegal - and I'm not).

I am so screwed.

And so, finally ... it begins.

I've been trying to write this blog post for three days. It isn't easy. (and I've edited it even since it was posted).

Earlier this week I told my boss that I was going to begin looking for a new job. This is a big deal, for a couple reasons.

First, I've been there for 14 years. I've worked myself up to a place where I make really decent money (for this area, for someone with no formal training), which gives me a quite comfortable standard of living. I also have a lot of perks and benefits on this job, and ultimate job security - I would never, ever have to worry about being let go, for any reason. (and, I just bought a house less than 2 years ago!)

Second, my boss relies on me absolutely. I manage a large chunk of his legal practice, autonomously, with little to no intervention on his part. Which means, for him, he knows that vital work will get done, get done right, and get done on time without his having to even think about it. That's a pretty valuable thing for an attorney or any boss to have - and he knows that he'd have a very, very hard time replacing me. Not that I've ever considered myself irreplaceable, because I haven't - though my boss himself has said that I practically am. From his perspective, finding someone who can do the work, and going through the requisite time and training until he can trust them like he trusts me, would take years - years during which he'd suddenly have a very hard time of it, because he'd have to get very hands-on again with the work, monitoring and supervising everything. Something he doesn't want to do. Not to mention that finding anyone else who will put up with the circumstances that are causing me to leave is almost impossible, in itself.

So it's not that I can't be replaced, but it would be very, very inconvenient and difficult for him in the meantime.

For those reasons, my ever leaving there was really not considered an option. Until this week.

I always said I would never even start looking for a job behind my boss' back, without at least telling him. This was in part because, except for one major thing (which I'll get to in a minute), he's always been a very good boss, and personally been very good to me, having done me some pretty decent favors that have nothing to do with work. Out of respect for him, I felt I owed him the decency to warn him if I decided to look for another job, instead of simply giving him a mere two weeks' notice to try to replace me - as much as he relies on me, that would just be nasty.

The other important consideration was that, despite that in most things I'm bullet-proof with him, I always knew that if I was actively seeking a new job, it just might piss him off enough that he could turn on me, and he might even fire me. So I knew that I could never use that as a threat to get something from him (not that I would) or to try to force a change in this intolerable situation, and if I was ever going to say I was looking for a new job, I had to be absolutely, 100% prepared to really leave this job - possibly earlier than planned. Because he might just decide to fire me instead.

Well, he didn't (yet). When I told him, he was extremely devastated and upset. He really didn't want me to leave. But he did understand why (more on that, again, in a minute). First he asked me to give him just 7 days to try to work out a solution. Against my better judgment, but again out of respect for him, I agreed. So my hands are tied until this coming Thursday; then I can proceed upon my job hunt.

It was kind of a waste of time, because there's not going to be anything he can do to fix the situation. The only fix available at this point, he won't take the step.

What's this all about? I've been harassed by a co-worker for the last 12 years, the entire time she's worked there. People who know me know enough of it that there's nothing I need to say. People who don't know me, there's no way to explain the situation fully in any amount of blog posts. But I can try to sum it up like this.

This co-worker has harassed and bullied me for 12 years. She routinely yells at me, talks down to me in an incredibly snotty, condescending manner, and just makes nasty, mean comments to me. Now, she doesn't do this 100% of the time. About, maybe, 20% of the time she acts normal - just treating me like any normal person treats any co-worker, pleasant and decent. But it's that other 80% that I can't take. And the 20/80 split isn't always spread out over a standard work week. She might be decent for a month or two, then go for six or eight months treating me like that every single day.

It's also not just me. She has treated every single person who works in that office like that, for 12 years. We can't keep people working there, in large part because of her. We've gone through about 25 people in the 14 years I've been there, and all but one or two of them left either mostly or at the very least in part because of her treatment of them.

The current crop of employees all hate her, because she's such a nasty bitch to everyone all the time.

But what's impossible to explain in a mere blog post is, she's not just a 'difficult' person, she's not just a little mean - she's completely over the top whacked, it's impossible to get along with her, to please her, or to even endure her for very long. She's not just mean, she often has screaming fits of absolute rage, where you really don't know what she's going to do.

Everyone who currently works there, and everyone who has had any amount of contact with her on a regular basis that I've ever talked to, all have exactly and completely the same opinion: we all think she has a real mental disorder, and needs to be on medication. Lately even the boss admitted to me that he feels the same way! (why he's not doing anything about it, I'll get to in a minute). Even her own family has contacted my boss twice in the last two years expressing concern for her mental state, and asking his intervention. (to date, as far as I know, he's ignored these requests).

It's possible that she's bipolar, I don't know - I'm no mental health expert. I do know that I've never in my life known anyone who can be so just downright mean - she will say the nastiest things designed solely just to be as hurtful and rotten as possible. And as I said, it's not just that, it's sometimes fits of absolute rage.

A few years ago she had a major meltdown, screaming at a co-worker so bad that this person walked out and never returned. Around the same time the boss was receiving complaints about her from EVERYONE - the office staff, clients, every one of his friends who ever call the office, just about everyone. When he sat her down to try to talk to her, she flew into one of those fits of rage at him and stormed out of the office. (He is not immune to her treatment either, so he also gets it first hand - he just has more control over the situations than we do because he's the boss). That time he was actually pissed, and seriously considered firing her. I told him then - again - that I didn't see how I could continue working with her. He promised me that as a condition of not firing her, he would 'make her' get mental health treatment and any medication she needed.

Unfortunately, he didn't follow through. Which he now admits he wished he'd have done, but ... it's too late now.

While I said she treats everyone like this, she has had a personal vendetta against me in particular for years, for I believe a couple reasons. First, I'm the only person still there who has been there longer than her, and she can't (or hadn't been able to) get rid of. If I had left, she would be totally in charge because she'd have the place by the balls, basically. She could be as much of a tyrant as she wants, and there would be no one to thwart her at all. But with me there, I'm always a thorn in her side. I encourage people to not take her shit, to go to the boss and complain about her - NOT until they've come to me first. I never start out with any new employee by bad-mouthing her, I never say a word until they've finally given up and come to me to ask WTF. I've been accused in the past of 'purposely turning new employees against her,' but it's ludicrous. A), I don't, and B), I don't have to, as she does that herself quickly enough. I had also never had any qualms about going to the boss and complaining about her myself - even though it rarely did me any good, I still did it. At least, until about a year ago when that began to backfire because he began to tell her. Then I just gave up. But despite how much she ruins my job for me, I'm the one person she can't cow, who won't just back down and kiss her ass because of being afraid of her - like everyone else does.

So that's one set of reasons she has a particular hatred for me. I'm the only one she can't completely control, and the only one who has been there longer than her, thwarting her plans at Total Office Domination.

The other reason is this. About 5 or 6 years ago, she slammed me up against a wall. It wasn't calculated, as in she came up to me, grabbed me and slammed up against the wall. It was more subtle than that. She'd been in one of her horrible bad moods, just evil bad, a sort of simmering rage, for days. I was walking down a hallway when she came flying out of a doorway I was nearing, walking so fast she was almost running. She initially bumped into me, because of her hurry and her anger. But that's where things went awry. As soon as she made contact with me, instead of stopping, moving away, even maybe saying "I'm sorry" or "Are you okay?" like any normal person would do - instead she leaned in and just slammed me up against the wall, then went on by, without saying a word. Much the way a rude person might push someone out of their way if they were rushing through a crowd for some dire emergency.

It didn't matter to me that it wasn't calculated and pre-planned, it was still utter bullshit. In the moment she had to make a decision, she chose to do the wrong thing, to take her psychotic rage out on me because I happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Well, I told the boss I wouldn't work with her anymore. I left for the day, and told him I would not be back to work until he could guarantee my safety. I considered quitting. I considered filing assault charges against her. But something happened. Because this wasn't planned by me, I was in no real position to lose my income just then. And the next day, my boss was mad at ME. He'd talked to her, she'd of course denied the whole thing, and he'd decided that I was just making mountains out of molehills, blowing the whole thing out of proportion, and trying to cause trouble. He as much as ordered me back to work, and I began to fear he was going to fire me - and that I might not even be able to collect unemployment, because it was my word against hers, and the boss obviously believed her. (That's also why I didn't just quit and attempt to collect unemployment, or file charges against her - because it was my word against hers, with no witnesses; she'd never done anything like that before; and my boss was siding with her; I figured I'd never be believed, and would look like a trouble-causing liar in the process).

So I settled on a compromise of working part time.

This worked pretty well for a few years - the perk of only having to be there a few hours a day went a long ways to offsetting having to be in the same building with her, and she was so furious at me that she mostly stayed away from me for months. But unfortunately someone eventually quit (again), and I was forced to go back to work full time.

Meanwhile, the boss told me later that since that time, she particularly 'detested me' - because she still maintained that I had fabricated the whole thing simply to cause her problems, and maybe to have an excuse to go part time (which I otherwise would never have been able to do). In fact, at the time he told me this, a year or two ago, he almost seemed to be implying that her hatred of me, and accordingly her treatment of me, was my fault, because of what "I" did. (that was then; he now admits she's nuts, though I still don't know whether he ever believed me about that incident).

So those are a few of the reasons I am her particular favorite target.

The reasons the boss won't do anything about her are complex and convoluted. Since her first days in the office, she's been ass-kissing the boss and his entire family - she made a point of ingratiating herself with them early on, and also trying to make herself as indispensable as possible. She handles all my boss' personal bills and financial matters, is hip deep in his children's school, church and social activities, as well as their medical care; she is the liason between his mother's nursing home and him; and she cares for the boss' aging and ailing father, in addition to her office work. She's like his personal valet and servant, in addition to the office manager, where she also handles ALL the money and finances of the office. He's come to rely on her so totally and completely in his personal life that I think he's afraid he just couldn't function without her.

Despite her craziness, he also considers her a friend. She goes to all their important family functions, holidays, birthdays, church functions, etc.

Lately he's begun to admit that he knows she's crazy, but he says he simply doesn't know what to do. He says he "can't" fire her. I think this is in large part because he's afraid of what she'd do. I have no doubt she would completely and totally lose her mind if he fired her - her entire being is so wrapped up in being his family's personal assistant and his office manager, that I think she'd just completely come unglued if he fired her. And I think he knows that, and doesn't want to be the 'cause' of that. Despite he admits she's nuts, he also says he does care about her. And, she's VERY close with the boss' father, so for that reason also, he doesn't want to do anything that drastic.

For years, in his ongoing refusal to deal with the situation - for those reasons - he left us all thrown to the wolves. He refused to do anything when I complained about her. Everyone else became afraid to complain about her, as everyone knew that he wouldn't do anything, and he might instead get mad at them for badmouthing this person who was so important to him. For awhile he started telling her every time someone complained about her - his excuse was that he couldn't correct the problem if he couldn't tell her what the problem was. This only resulted in her becoming furious at the person who complained, and making their life even more than usual a living hell for awhile. Which meant, of course, that we had no recourse whatsoever against her treatment of us.

I am not sure whether the boss really thought that would help, or whether it was his way of trying to avoid the whole issue - because it certainly resulted in everyone (myself included) refusing to bother telling him anything anymore. He has a track record of trying to avoid dealing with this situation. So to his way of thinking, the problem was resolved, at least for him - he didn't have to hear about it anymore.

Problem was, it certainly wasn't resolved, and has now escalated to new levels of unendurability.

As for why we - the employees - couldn't just gang up and say 'Screw you, we've had enough.' Well - it's just not possible with her. If it were a "normal," sane but just mean, nasty person, this might work. Not with her. There is no "reasoning" with her, it's simply impossible. The minute you even try to suggest anything that constitutes criticism of her (or she even thinks does), she flies into a rage. You can't have, much less win an argument with her, because she will just talk louder and louder until she's screaming so that you can't possibly say one word. She will resort to nasty, mean, horrific things to say to you, anything to shut you up. No morals, there are no lines she won't cross at all. Since none of the rest of us are confrontational, nasty people, it's like - well, it'd be kind of like putting a grizzly bear and a small friendly dog in a cage. She'd just maul us, and we'd never have a chance, because none of us can think as evilly as she does, or would resort to the tactics she would use to 'win.'

I know. I tried, just once, and it was horrific. Never again.

So ... that's where the situation was last week when she finally did one last thing to me that was just that proverbial final straw. And then, after that happened, I began to discover that for about the last couple weeks, she has been actively sabotaging my ability to do my job. Which is a new low even for her - that's one thing I've never really had a problem with, with her before, I always assumed because she knew that sabotaging my work would ultimately negatively impact the attorney, not just me. But apparently things have changed. A bunch of stuff all began becoming evident all at once, that all could be traced directly back to her - taking documents, information and phone messages from clients whose cases I am solely responsible for, then making sure that I don't get the information, and that it's not even scanned in (it's office policy to scan every document that comes into the office; if that were done, when documents came up missing, I could at least re-print them; but by not scanning them, I can't even do that). Not providing me with information from clients that only she has, which causes me to miss deadlines or not be able to complete tasks the attorney relies on me to do. In one instance, even making disparaging comments about me to a client (I don't know who, so I can't even ask the client to corroborate - I over heard her end of the conversation, and know she was talking to a client at the time - but don't know which one).

It's just gone too far. And my boss will not do anything about her because he can't.

So, for all that ... I finally told him last week I'm going to start looking for another job. I hate that I have to do this, as after 14 years I've worked myself into a position I won't be able to easily replicate starting brand new somewhere else. I'm going to probably take a cut in pay and benefits, and not have anywhere near the freedom and autonomy I have at this job.

But ... I just can't take this harassment and sabotage anymore. Life's too short for this, and I deserve better. Financial security is a beautiful thing, but no amount of it can make up for the abuse and harassment I've had to endure from this psycho, and ... well, to paraphrase an old commercial, no matter what happens financially, the peace of mind and lack of abuse in my life will be priceless.

I don't, however, intend to just fly out of there taking the first job that comes my way. I'm hoping, with the light at the end of the tunnel of knowing I'm finally doing something, to be able to take the time to hunt out a position that's right for me, even target specific places I'd like to work, rather than taking whatever presents itself in the local paper or online job search engines. I want to conduct a proactive job search, not a reactive 'get out at any price' one. And I'm trying to be optimistic that in time, I will find the perfect place for me, with sane reasonable people who respect me and don't abuse me, making good money, a place I enjoy going to every day, instead of dread like now.

One thing could blow this all up. When the slamming me up against the wall incident occurred, initially my boss was upset (not at me), frustrated, and sympathetic towards me. By the next day he was angry at me, and grew angrier every day for the next several, until I returned to work. He'd begun to blame me. After he talked to her.

I told him on Wednesday that I was going to leave. For the rest of the week he was not angry at me, but very upset at the situation, and desperate to try to fix it and keep me. But if, over time, things shift again like they did last time, and he grows angry with me for 'abandoning' him and wanting to quit, things could get ugly. It's possible he could find someone else to do my job and just fire me.

That was a chance I knew I'd be taking when I told him, and I'm prepared to accept it, if that's what happens. Anyway, that might not be the end of the world. If he fired me because I told him I was looking for a new job, I could get unemployment without having to worry about anyone believing my story about my crazy co-worker, and then I'd have some income to tide me over, and more free time to work on the job search.

So ... we'll see what the next week brings. I'll keep you posted.

Abney Park New Video

Too awesome! Abney Park's newest CD goes on sale tonight at midnight, and they released a new video of one song from the CD. It's pretty awesome!

House Projects Update

I'm finally getting psyched about house projects again. It's funny what random occurrences can trigger a new line of thought.

I was out with Tyler in the yard one day a couple months ago, and an elderly gentleman happened by on his morning walk. We'd run into him once before and stopped to chat, so he stopped to chat again. I remember he told me his name was Frank, well it was really Francesco, but he goes by Frank. Very nice old gent. And I remember we were talking about houses, and how much work they could be. While of course this was a great house, well maintained, there were all kinds of things we personally wanted to do to change it, and things needed updated.

He said he was going to tell me the same thing he'd told his son, when he bought a house - just focus on one thing at a time, and don't move on until you get that one thing done.

Well, it's kind of common sense, and in fact I'd said when we bought the house that's what I was going to do ... but somewhere along the way I'd lost sight of that goal, and had gotten overwhelmed with all the things that I wanted or needed to do, to the point of near paralysis and getting nothing done at all.

Frank's reminder got me thinking again, and I re-focused on that way of looking at things. I decided that's exactly what I was going to do. The dining room was bugging me the worst, and I decided that I wasn't going to think about any other room in the house until I got the dining room done - with a goal of having it done in time for Thanksgiving dinner.

It's worked out well, as I've made steady progress on this room (okay, maybe not quite as fast as I'd like, but ... all things considered, as well as can be expected). And what makes me happier is that I'm sticking to the plan - focusing on this and nothing else till I get it done, and being relentless in getting it done - rather than just letting it languish, as I had begun to do for too long. This serves the dual purpose of (a) actually getting something accomplished, and (b) no longer feeling so overwhelmed about the rest of the house, as when some other room starts to bug me, I just remind myself, "I'm working on the dining room now. Later I'll get to you, then you will be my sole focus."

This weekend and last night we finished up getting the supplies needed to complete the top molding (or moulding, as Home Despot spells it, but Dictionary.com approved my way as well, so I'm going with it - moulding looks funny to me). We'd decided to take advantage of some little tricks to avoid mitering anything, as while it's not impossible, it's kind of a pain in the arse I'd prefer to avoid, at least in this room (and I can't currently locate my dad's miter box, anyway). They sell little corner pieces that leave you straight edges to butt the molding up against.

But we discovered the strips of molding were 11' long, and our wall is - of course - 11' 3". I didn't want to buy extra or do a lot of math, much less patch pieces together any more than necessary, so we got clever. Greg found some square decorative bits that we'll use in the center of each wall, so again, only have to butt the molding up against a flat surface (and one 11' strip was sufficient for each wall).

As a bonus, they're cool looking, and it's something unusual and unique - always a plus with me. So I'm psyched. I'm going to do some special painting on these, but that'll remain a surprise till they're done. (Unfortunately that'll make it take longer, but it'll be a lot of fun, so I'm kind of excited about it).

I'm hoping to work on this during the week, not just weekends. Only having Saturdays for house projects has been another thing that has slowed me down more than I like, so I'm going to start trying to find time during the week to get a little done as well. The molding needs cut, primered and painted before it can be put up - the painting at least I can work on during the week. And of course the decorative little project mentioned above.

That'll be a major step in giving this room a more finished look. Next is baseboard, and painting the rest of the trim, fixing up the coat-hanging and shoe-storing area, and figuring out what to do with that stupid window thing into the spare room ... this.




To the left of that, between it and the door, I'm installing coat hooks, and underneath it I'm going to arrange an area for wet shoes and boots during the winter. But that thing ... I considered trying to patch it up to just make it a big solid wall, but it would be very tricky, and would never look quite right anyway - it would always look 'patched' - so I'm not sure I want to do that. Instead I'm trying to figure out a way to make use of it creatively. One idea I had was to line it with shelves and put little bins or baskets in it for gloves and hats during the winter - but it won't serve much purpose during the summer, so I'm unsure about that one.

And we need to get busy on the door issue if we're going to get anything done before winter, but I'm torn on that.

Of course, the banquette (booth seating thing I have in mind) is a major undertaking, and I'm not ready to tackle that yet. And it may well be that part doesn't get done by Thanksgiving - but that's okay, as we have other tables and chairs we can use, as long as the room overall looks decent. I have plans in mind for how to build my own banquette, instead of buying one (money's starting to get to be a bit of an issue, and they are ungodly expensive pre-made), but I need to sit down and do more work on that plan.

Anyway - progress ensues. And I'm already looking forward to the next area ... I'm still only focused on the dining room, but I'm starting to brainstorm ideas. I've decided to just move around the house in order, so my next stop is the hallway - currently a long, boring dark tunnel. At first I despaired of thinking of anything unique to do with that, but then inspiration struck. For starters, it's getting a two-toned paint job, dark color on the bottom, lighter on top, with a small decorative strip of molding (kind of like a chair rail, but not) along the dividing line. Better lighting. A few steampunk touches (why not? it's a great place to add that sort of thing in small doses). Shouldn't actually be too difficult at all ... except maybe stripping the wallpaper. Though I'm kind of encouraged, as the wallpaper all through the hallway and living room is starting to fall down on its own, which thrills me no end. I'm probably the only person on earth who smiles happily every time I see the peeling wallpaper. Because that means it's coming loose on it's own, which hopefully means it won't be such a bear to remove.

I know I'm probably dreaming - it'll come loose easily for another foot or so, then stick like hell everywhere else. Well, whatever - it's coming down, easy or difficult.

Technically the kitchen might be considered the next adjacent area, and there is a TON of stuff I want to do in there, but for some reason, I'm avoiding it. I think it's because most of what I want to do is going to be expensive, and it's the room that needs the least amount of stuff done to it, so it's not bugging me as bad as some of the other areas.

So, I'm psyched, the dining room's moving along, and here in about a month or so ought to be quite pleasant.

Before I go - Rhys, if you're reading this (or still awake after that boring blather), thanks for the reminder about the online meds - I'd actually forgotten about that. That might very well be a good option under the circumstances. You're like Wodehouse's Jeeves - always the perfect idea at the perfect time. :o)

Those Crazy Knitters

I was perusing Ravelry today looking for dog sweater patterns. I seem to have lost Tyler's dog sweater somewhere (it's either buried in the truck from the trip, which is as good as lost as far as I'm concerned; or I lost it in the hotel room, which is also a possibility; regardless, it was pretty ratty anyway) and he's been chilling easily lately, so with winter coming, I really thought he needed a new, cozy warm sweater. I was going to go buy one, but hey - I knit! Why buy a knitted something when I can make it?

But while there, I found these ...

(Disclaimer: I tried to make each item a link to its page on Ravelry, but Ravelry won't let you do that - the link just takes you to a generic internet search page. I suspect it's because Ravelry is a membership-only site [though membership is free]. I apologize if I've stepped on anyone's toes, that was not my intent - I didn't want to infringe on any copyrights or anything like that, I just wanted to share what I thought was some really awesomely creative combinations of yarn and animals. Anyone who is interested in these patterns should hop on over to Ravelry and get your own self a free membership. And if anyone whose pattern pictures I've posted happens across this and feels I am in fact stepping on their toes, please email me at rayneoftara AT yahoo DOT com, and I will promptly remove your portion or the entire post. Again - not trying to offend, just share some of the stuff I found so great at Ravelry).

Okay - moving on ...

I want to get a cat just so I can make this and put it on it.


That was the first in the line of Stacy Mar International Cat Hats (that one being Japan), of which this (Turkey) is also a contender.


And then I want to start a line of Designer Rodent Wear:




These are called "Bear Booties" ...


... and I thought it was a joke until I read the description on the pattern page:

"This pattern is to keep the bear’s paws warm during surgery. Asia Animal Foundation would love 4 booties (since bears have 4 paws) but will happily accept less and combine with other donations."

Who knew?

Likewise, I thought these people had finally crossed the line into Knitters With Too Much Time On Their Hands (Or Too Much Yarn) ...




... till I ran onto yet a third such pattern, and read the info page for it. Turns out that chickens, too, are sometimes rescued as abused animals, and often are missing a lot of their feathers. In cold climates they can freeze to death if not protected until their feathers grow back ... so, this actually is useful.

People who abuse animals deserve to be treated the exact same way they treated their animals.

Anyway - I considered this ...


... but Tyler would never forgive me.

There's just something about knitting a dog sweater out of fake fur that I both love, and makes my eyes kind of cross at the same time.


But I found a couple of potential dog sweater patterns, so I'm off to check them out and hopefully get Tyler warmed up for winter.

Tyler Update

Tyler seems to be doing better and better. I've been leaving the collar off of him for large stretches of time. I put it on when I go to work still, and at night when I go to bed. But otherwise it stays off ... except for those times when Tyler starts frantically trying to rub his eye in the carpet or paw at it, which he did several times last night. Then I put the collar back on for awhile till he gets over it. I'm sure it feels annoying and itches, but I'm really concerned about him doing some kind of damage to it - the vet said it's healing well, and the graft is fully adhered to the eye now, but all the same - it looks so fragile, that graft sitting on top of his eyeball like that. I just can't think rubbing on it can be any good.

The crate's been retired, though, which I'm sure Tyler's beyond thrilled about. During the day I pen him up in the dining room, from which I've removed almost everything, so there's nothing in here for him to hurt himself on. And at night I've been letting him sleep in the bed between me and Greg, then moving him to his dog bed when I get up in the morning. He's been getting restless at night, though, and I'm always paranoid of him getting up and walking off the side of the bed (which I've just barely stopped him from doing several times in the past) - so every time he moves, I wake up. It's not a good plan, and I may start just putting him straight to bed in his own dog bed. But at least he doesn't need the crate.

It's been great seeing him walking around with his eyes so wide open. Greg also commented last night that his eyes look huge, like bigger than normal. So it's not just me. I still don't know whether it's just because we're so not used to seeing them open all the way, since it's been so long, or if he actually is holding them open extra wide.

He's been a lot more active, enjoying his walks, even down to the corner and back, trotting the whole way. Yesterday I got several tail wags from him, something I hadn't seen in awhile. And he's been eating a little better, though he still seems really thin. This week I'm putting him back on a home cooked diet, which he likes better, so hopefully he will eat more.

And, he's navigating around the house just fine - which means the reason he started walking into things back in August probably wasn't a cognitive dysfunction, like one of the local vets said - it was because his eyes were so screwed up. I took him off the Anipryl the week he had surgery, mostly just because there was too much else to worry about, and getting an extra pill in him at that point had become too much of a pain in the ass - especially a pill that I suspected wasn't really necessary anyway. So he hasn't had any of that medication since Sept. 20, and he's doing very well with that. He still doesn't see everything, especially in dim light, but he's pretty much back to how he was this summer. The kids are here this weekend, and were in their room last night, and at one point I found Tyler in their room - he'd gone down the hall, into their room, and was exploring - and there's stuff laying around on the floor, which he was navigating around with no problem. No 'getting lost' in rooms or stuck in corners anymore.

So, screw the Anipryl, his brain's fine.

On October 20 he has an appointment at a holistic vet in Beaver, PA. I actually made that appointment some time ago, before all this emergency eye stuff happened. I'd wanted to take him anyway, to double check his diet and get some guidance on that - but now that he's got all this other stuff going on, I'm really glad we're going. I no longer trust his local vet, and Tyler has several other problems that need checked out. Problems which I'm hoping are relatively minor and/or treatable, but ... I won't know till I get the expert's opinion, and that sure isn't the local vets.

I had written a letter to that vet conglomerate, explaining what happened and how thoroughly I felt they dropped the ball, almost costing Tyler both eyes, totally unnecessarily - but I haven't sent it. I figure once I do, I won't be able to take Tyler there anymore because at the least, the vets involved would probably have a snarky attitude towards me after that.

I'm torn, because on the one hand, I feel the director of that place ought to know how bad they screwed this up. But on the other hand, I could never trust them for anything serious again, yet it would be handy to still have a local vet for mundane stuff like heartworm pills, thyroid medication, and routine blood work, since the holistic vet is over an hour away. I'll have to put some more thought to it.